If you're talking nerd with a dude about the graphic novels you read because .. I don't remember how it came up .. But then like ten minutes later he calls you and says, "hey I'm going to [insert comic store here] later, do you want to come," do you think there are ulterior motives? Oh! Flash! I remember. He said something about ideas going stale and that's why comic writers are always flipped every couple years and I said I don't think that's always the case (I could be wrong I'm not THAT nerd), thus conversation ensued. Anyway, I declined the offer politely regardless. But I just don't know. I'm so uninterested that I go through life oblivious. Since that hasn't always worked out in my favor, maybe it's time I start asking myself the pertinent questions.
Or maybe I could just say No a lot and carry on.
Sent wirelessly from my BlackBerry device on the Bell network.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
sleep. need. sleep.
i want to say that i have some kind of iron deficiency or low blood sugar or something, but the truth is, i just go to bed late. and i sleep for about 5 1/2 to 6 hours every night. and i can function on 6, am best at 6 1/2, and am dying as i am leaning closer to the 5-5 1/2 every night lately.
why don't i go to bed earlier, you ask. well that sounds like a simple solution, but it's not that simple for me. even on nights when i do get my ass to bed at a decent time, i end up reading or doing a crossword and that keeps me up for a bit longer. and if i don't? then i just lie there and swear in my head as i don't fall asleep in the darkness.
and so since i know i won't be able to fall asleep right away, i've been letting myself watch shows a little bit later than usual. this is all because my sister and niece were here so i fell totally behind (those nights i was up because of the baby. she's cute and loveable, but becomes a crazy party monster at night), and now i have to catch up on like 2 weeks of shows. my life is sad.
and so even though i know what all the problems are, i'm not trying very hard to fix it. i need to sleep. and i need to sleep badly. i'm so tired ALL THE TIME!! argh. yawn.
why don't i go to bed earlier, you ask. well that sounds like a simple solution, but it's not that simple for me. even on nights when i do get my ass to bed at a decent time, i end up reading or doing a crossword and that keeps me up for a bit longer. and if i don't? then i just lie there and swear in my head as i don't fall asleep in the darkness.
and so since i know i won't be able to fall asleep right away, i've been letting myself watch shows a little bit later than usual. this is all because my sister and niece were here so i fell totally behind (those nights i was up because of the baby. she's cute and loveable, but becomes a crazy party monster at night), and now i have to catch up on like 2 weeks of shows. my life is sad.
and so even though i know what all the problems are, i'm not trying very hard to fix it. i need to sleep. and i need to sleep badly. i'm so tired ALL THE TIME!! argh. yawn.
Friday, October 9, 2009
what the eff. the king is dead.
and while in most instances these days, people would be referring to the king of pop, i am not. i am referring to the debacle that is my father's b-day party. i am at the point where i do not even want to go. i just don't care anymore.
so here's the deal. the old man is turning 60. and his bday is not actually until november, but he wanted to do the party on halloween. and i said, if that's the case, it will have to be a costume party. that would have been fun right? doesn't matter. my sister decided that his party should be over a long weekend so as to make it easier for them to attend from the prairies. so one would think november long weekend since there isn't any conflict there. except that he doesn't want to celebrate after the fact. and he's getting another all expenses paid trip to asia. so october long weekend it was. at this point the only other family he has in town can't make it because they made plans long ago because he told them his party would be in november. way too complicated already.
so he finds a hall to throw this bash. yay! but he wants everyone to be dressed all formal. boo! the hall has murals on the wall, streamers on the ceiling, and red and white checkered tablecloths. see how formal isn't really the attire one would think to wear at a venue like this? but that's even a moot point. who cares how people dress? not me. i'm just about judging people. no matter what class your outfit falls into, if it's awful, i will secretly think mean mean thoughts regardless. that makes me chuckle.
my biggest ish has been the guestlist. every day he is adding and removing people. there is a rsvp by date for a reason. that reason is organization. i'm a huge fan. he doesn't know the meaning of the word. so he wants me to hold off on finalizing his table arrangements and printing out the stuff i need until he is ready. he thinks he'll be ready on saturday 5 minute before we leave the house. i'm giving him until later tonight. because i'm tired of it. i'm just tired. but even more bizarre? he wants us to go set up the venue tonight. how can we set up a venue when the more important thing regarding the set up is the number of people coming and where they are sitting? i can't print those off yet!! idiot!
he wanted to sing all night long and turn it into a concert. but i'm going to go ahead and say that not all of your audience is fan of the music. shiz i don't even think all of the audience is a fan of you. and i can 100% guarantee that one spunky former redhead at table 2 is not a fan of yours at all. so hold the phone, i'm going to come up with stuff to actually make this party fun! because that's what i do best - have fun.
and now that i've spent the money and come up with the ideas and did all the hard work, you're going to tell me that i do not know how to throw/organize a party of this magnitude and i'm incompetent!!?? talk about ungrateful. i haven't slept in days. i am barely eating too, because there is no time to go to work, do all of the crap i have to for his party, and get in some me-time. i have forgone spending quality time with people that i actually like so that i can go to dollar stores and find things that i need at a decent price point. and i could have picked the ugly gold elephants!! but i didn't!! i spent a dollar more per item and got the cute wooden blocks!
i called him this morning to ask him to tell me about the charity that he has chosen for the 50/50 draw and he told me he is on the board of directors. dude, i don't care if you're the custodian, i just want to know who benefits and how. and when i asked that (in a normal way, i wasn't a bitch yet), he said i was being a stupid jerk. well you know what? fuck you and fuck your stupid party. just because you dress up like elvis, it doesn't make you the fucking king. it makes you a douchebag. he has shown absolutely no appreciation for anything!! because i don't know anything about a party of this magnitude. well guess what? if i took my spreadsheets that you don't like, and my lists that you don't think work, and all my little signs and my pretty guestbook and all my boxes and envelopes and pictures, your party would SUCK. and if i didn't put in all those hours poring through the pictures of your ugly face and then stay up all night scanning them, you wouldn't have a slideshow. and if i didn't have friends who like me, there would be no one else helping to do anything. stupid grumpy forgetful self-involved self-absorbed inconsiderate old man.
if i wasn't 2 days away from 300 i would've started imbibing today at noon.
so here's the deal. the old man is turning 60. and his bday is not actually until november, but he wanted to do the party on halloween. and i said, if that's the case, it will have to be a costume party. that would have been fun right? doesn't matter. my sister decided that his party should be over a long weekend so as to make it easier for them to attend from the prairies. so one would think november long weekend since there isn't any conflict there. except that he doesn't want to celebrate after the fact. and he's getting another all expenses paid trip to asia. so october long weekend it was. at this point the only other family he has in town can't make it because they made plans long ago because he told them his party would be in november. way too complicated already.
so he finds a hall to throw this bash. yay! but he wants everyone to be dressed all formal. boo! the hall has murals on the wall, streamers on the ceiling, and red and white checkered tablecloths. see how formal isn't really the attire one would think to wear at a venue like this? but that's even a moot point. who cares how people dress? not me. i'm just about judging people. no matter what class your outfit falls into, if it's awful, i will secretly think mean mean thoughts regardless. that makes me chuckle.
my biggest ish has been the guestlist. every day he is adding and removing people. there is a rsvp by date for a reason. that reason is organization. i'm a huge fan. he doesn't know the meaning of the word. so he wants me to hold off on finalizing his table arrangements and printing out the stuff i need until he is ready. he thinks he'll be ready on saturday 5 minute before we leave the house. i'm giving him until later tonight. because i'm tired of it. i'm just tired. but even more bizarre? he wants us to go set up the venue tonight. how can we set up a venue when the more important thing regarding the set up is the number of people coming and where they are sitting? i can't print those off yet!! idiot!
he wanted to sing all night long and turn it into a concert. but i'm going to go ahead and say that not all of your audience is fan of the music. shiz i don't even think all of the audience is a fan of you. and i can 100% guarantee that one spunky former redhead at table 2 is not a fan of yours at all. so hold the phone, i'm going to come up with stuff to actually make this party fun! because that's what i do best - have fun.
and now that i've spent the money and come up with the ideas and did all the hard work, you're going to tell me that i do not know how to throw/organize a party of this magnitude and i'm incompetent!!?? talk about ungrateful. i haven't slept in days. i am barely eating too, because there is no time to go to work, do all of the crap i have to for his party, and get in some me-time. i have forgone spending quality time with people that i actually like so that i can go to dollar stores and find things that i need at a decent price point. and i could have picked the ugly gold elephants!! but i didn't!! i spent a dollar more per item and got the cute wooden blocks!
i called him this morning to ask him to tell me about the charity that he has chosen for the 50/50 draw and he told me he is on the board of directors. dude, i don't care if you're the custodian, i just want to know who benefits and how. and when i asked that (in a normal way, i wasn't a bitch yet), he said i was being a stupid jerk. well you know what? fuck you and fuck your stupid party. just because you dress up like elvis, it doesn't make you the fucking king. it makes you a douchebag. he has shown absolutely no appreciation for anything!! because i don't know anything about a party of this magnitude. well guess what? if i took my spreadsheets that you don't like, and my lists that you don't think work, and all my little signs and my pretty guestbook and all my boxes and envelopes and pictures, your party would SUCK. and if i didn't put in all those hours poring through the pictures of your ugly face and then stay up all night scanning them, you wouldn't have a slideshow. and if i didn't have friends who like me, there would be no one else helping to do anything. stupid grumpy forgetful self-involved self-absorbed inconsiderate old man.
if i wasn't 2 days away from 300 i would've started imbibing today at noon.
Friday, October 2, 2009
stop the spinning, i'm not ready.
i am a couple of days away from entering the last year of my 20s. i have been going through a weird mental state lately. and it's not like the age thing, because i'm not one of those people who withholds my age or is weird about turning 30 or 40 or whatever. i don't mind the process. it's life; it is what it is.
i guess what's weighing on me comes from planning my dad's 60th birthday. somehow his party has become a 300 attendees event. and that's fine, it's do-able, even though for some reason i have become the person on this. but the slideshow has taken up so much more time than i expected. and filtering through their decades of photos means filtering through decades of my photos. so i'm seeing all these versions of me - all these me's that i used to be. i am not who i was 10 years ago. hell, i'm not even who i was 5 years ago. and i guess it makes me wonder who i will be in the next 5-10 years. but in staying true to the poop, i don't want to think too hard about this and plan and make goals.
and then there is where i am in life. i don't know if this is where i want to be. but i don't know where i would remove myself to. i guess i hope that something or someone will come along and make the choice for me. realistically, that's not going to happen. bleh.
i guess what's weighing on me comes from planning my dad's 60th birthday. somehow his party has become a 300 attendees event. and that's fine, it's do-able, even though for some reason i have become the person on this. but the slideshow has taken up so much more time than i expected. and filtering through their decades of photos means filtering through decades of my photos. so i'm seeing all these versions of me - all these me's that i used to be. i am not who i was 10 years ago. hell, i'm not even who i was 5 years ago. and i guess it makes me wonder who i will be in the next 5-10 years. but in staying true to the poop, i don't want to think too hard about this and plan and make goals.
and then there is where i am in life. i don't know if this is where i want to be. but i don't know where i would remove myself to. i guess i hope that something or someone will come along and make the choice for me. realistically, that's not going to happen. bleh.
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